In today’s world, the recognition and use of someone’s preferred name and pronouns is considered one of the clearest and most meaningful ways to demonstrate respect for their identity.
This practice is important not only for individuals who identify as LGBTQ+ but also for anyone whose personal identity does not conform to traditional expectations of gender.
Unfortunately, many people still struggle to follow this simple yet profound standard.
Some cling to outdated societal norms, some act out of ignorance, and some intentionally disregard the lived experiences of transgender, non-binary, and gender-diverse people.
The consequences of such disregard are not merely social; they can also have deep emotional, psychological, and even physical impacts, particularly in sensitive environments such as medical care.
Bennett Kaspar-Williams, 37, from Los Angeles, has become a notable voice in advocating for respect and understanding regarding transgender and non-binary experiences, especially in the context of parenthood.
In October 2020, Bennett and his husband Malik welcomed their son Hudson into the world via cesarean delivery.
At that time, Bennett identified as male and used he/him/his pronouns, although he now identifies as non-binary and uses both he/him/his and they/them pronouns.
Despite taking all steps to communicate his gender clearly, Bennett faced repeated misgendering from hospital staff during his pregnancy and childbirth, which caused significant distress.
Nurses and other medical personnel referred to him as a “mother” instead of a father, ignoring the gender he had marked on official forms.
Reports of this experience were later covered by media outlets, including the Daily Mail, highlighting the ongoing challenges that transgender and non-binary parents encounter in healthcare systems.
Bennett’s journey to parenthood was deeply intentional and carefully considered. He first realized he was transgender in 2011 and began his gender transition in 2014.
Prior to starting his family, Bennett had undergone top surgery but had not undergone any procedures on his lower body.
The couple, Bennett and Malik, knew that for him to carry a child, he would need to pause testosterone therapy temporarily to allow his ovaries to resume functioning.
After thorough reflection and consultation with medical professionals, Bennett decided that carrying a child himself was a possibility he could embrace, despite the complex emotional and physical challenges it entailed.
To his and Malik’s surprise, conception occurred naturally shortly after they began trying—a joyful milestone that came sooner than expected.
The pregnancy coincided with the early stages of the COVID-19 pandemic, which added layers of uncertainty and anxiety.
“This was just about a week before we went into lockdown here in March 2020, so my high spirits were pretty quickly replaced by anxiety around the pandemic and how I would keep myself and my baby safe,” Bennett reflected.
Even amid these challenges, the pregnancy was a deeply meaningful and transformative period.
Yet, Bennett’s experience was marred by repeated misgendering by medical staff.
Despite clearly indicating his gender as male on all paperwork and medical forms, nurses and staff frequently referred to him as a “mother,” highlighting a persistent institutional assumption that pregnancy is inherently tied to womanhood.
“The only thing that made me dysphoric about my pregnancy was the misgendering that happened to me when I was getting medical care for my pregnancy,” Bennett said.
This experience demonstrated how deeply entrenched gender assumptions remain in medical settings, where protocols, forms, and staff training often fail to accommodate or even recognize transgender and non-binary patients.
Bennett’s story illustrates that even individuals who proactively communicate their identity may face barriers when institutional systems are not inclusive or well-informed.
Following Hudson’s birth, Bennett became an advocate for challenging the notion that childbirth is inherently tied to gender identity.
He has spoken publicly about the need to decouple the concept of womanhood from motherhood.
In an interview with the New York Post, he explained, “The business of pregnancy – and yes, I say business, because the entire institution of pregnancy care in America is centred around selling this concept of ‘motherhood’ – is so intertwined with gender that it was hard to escape being misgendered.”
He further elaborated, “No one can ever really know whether having children is possible until you try — being born with a uterus doesn’t make conceiving or carrying a child a certainty.
That’s why it’s so important that we stop defining ‘womanhood’ in terms of ‘motherhood,’ because it’s a false equivalency that all women can become mothers, that all mothers carry their children, or that all people who carry children are mothers.”
Bennett’s story also sheds light on the broader social and legal challenges faced by transgender and non-binary parents in the United States.
Many transgender individuals encounter systemic barriers in healthcare, from forms and electronic records that assume a binary gender to medical professionals who are insufficiently trained in providing gender-affirming care.
Misgendering can cause acute emotional distress, exacerbate dysphoria, and impact the overall healthcare experience.
Moreover, the lack of inclusive policies often leaves transgender parents without adequate legal recognition, particularly in matters of parental rights, birth certificate listings, and medical decision-making.
By sharing his experiences publicly, Bennett raises awareness of these critical issues and advocates for systemic change that prioritizes respect, understanding, and inclusivity.
Three years after Hudson’s birth, Bennett and Malik continue to thrive as parents. Hudson is now a joyful, energetic, and curious three-year-old.
“This sweet guy is 3 years old today! Malik Kaspar-Williams and I are so lucky to be his parents,” Bennett wrote on social media in October 2023, celebrating their family and the joy Hudson brings into their lives.
Their journey highlights that transgender and non-binary people can successfully navigate parenthood when given respect, resources, and support, challenging outdated stereotypes about gender roles in families.
Beyond the personal and emotional dimensions, Bennett’s story carries important cultural and societal lessons.
It emphasizes the necessity of respecting individuals’ self-identification and the profound harm that can result when this respect is denied, particularly in healthcare and parenting contexts.
By advocating for proper acknowledgment of transgender and non-binary parents, Bennett helps broaden the public understanding of what parenthood can look like.
His experiences demonstrate that supporting gender diversity in parenting is not just a matter of social justice—it is also essential for the well-being and dignity of children and parents alike.
Ultimately, Bennett’s experience underscores resilience, self-determination, and the importance of compassion.
While misgendering during such a critical life event was painful, he chose to transform that pain into advocacy, education, and love.
Bennett’s story is a powerful reminder that progress comes not from anger or exclusion but from visibility, understanding, and a commitment to seeing people as they truly are.
It is a testament to the reality that family, care, and identity are deeply personal, multifaceted, and deserving of respect.
By living authentically and advocating for inclusivity, Bennett Kaspar-Williams continues to shape a more equitable and understanding society for parents of all gender identities.
In today’s world, the recognition and use of someone’s preferred name and pronouns is considered one of the clearest and most meaningful ways to demonstrate respect for their identity.
This practice is important not only for individuals who identify as LGBTQ+ but also for anyone whose personal identity does not conform to traditional expectations of gender.
Unfortunately, many people still struggle to follow this simple yet profound standard.
Some cling to outdated societal norms, some act out of ignorance, and some intentionally disregard the lived experiences of transgender, non-binary, and gender-diverse people.
The consequences of such disregard are not merely social; they can also have deep emotional, psychological, and even physical impacts, particularly in sensitive environments such as medical care.
Bennett Kaspar-Williams, 37, from Los Angeles, has become a notable voice in advocating for respect and understanding regarding transgender and non-binary experiences, especially in the context of parenthood.
In October 2020, Bennett and his husband Malik welcomed their son Hudson into the world via cesarean delivery.
At that time, Bennett identified as male and used he/him/his pronouns, although he now identifies as non-binary and uses both he/him/his and they/them pronouns.
Despite taking all steps to communicate his gender clearly, Bennett faced repeated misgendering from hospital staff during his pregnancy and childbirth, which caused significant distress.
Nurses and other medical personnel referred to him as a “mother” instead of a father, ignoring the gender he had marked on official forms.
Reports of this experience were later covered by media outlets, including the Daily Mail, highlighting the ongoing challenges that transgender and non-binary parents encounter in healthcare systems.
Bennett’s journey to parenthood was deeply intentional and carefully considered. He first realized he was transgender in 2011 and began his gender transition in 2014.
Prior to starting his family, Bennett had undergone top surgery but had not undergone any procedures on his lower body.
The couple, Bennett and Malik, knew that for him to carry a child, he would need to pause testosterone therapy temporarily to allow his ovaries to resume functioning.
After thorough reflection and consultation with medical professionals, Bennett decided that carrying a child himself was a possibility he could embrace, despite the complex emotional and physical challenges it entailed.
To his and Malik’s surprise, conception occurred naturally shortly after they began trying—a joyful milestone that came sooner than expected.
The pregnancy coincided with the early stages of the COVID-19 pandemic, which added layers of uncertainty and anxiety.
“This was just about a week before we went into lockdown here in March 2020, so my high spirits were pretty quickly replaced by anxiety around the pandemic and how I would keep myself and my baby safe,” Bennett reflected.
Even amid these challenges, the pregnancy was a deeply meaningful and transformative period.
Yet, Bennett’s experience was marred by repeated misgendering by medical staff.
Despite clearly indicating his gender as male on all paperwork and medical forms, nurses and staff frequently referred to him as a “mother,” highlighting a persistent institutional assumption that pregnancy is inherently tied to womanhood.
“The only thing that made me dysphoric about my pregnancy was the misgendering that happened to me when I was getting medical care for my pregnancy,” Bennett said.
This experience demonstrated how deeply entrenched gender assumptions remain in medical settings, where protocols, forms, and staff training often fail to accommodate or even recognize transgender and non-binary patients.
Bennett’s story illustrates that even individuals who proactively communicate their identity may face barriers when institutional systems are not inclusive or well-informed.
Following Hudson’s birth, Bennett became an advocate for challenging the notion that childbirth is inherently tied to gender identity.
He has spoken publicly about the need to decouple the concept of womanhood from motherhood.
In an interview with the New York Post, he explained, “The business of pregnancy – and yes, I say business, because the entire institution of pregnancy care in America is centred around selling this concept of ‘motherhood’ – is so intertwined with gender that it was hard to escape being misgendered.”
He further elaborated, “No one can ever really know whether having children is possible until you try — being born with a uterus doesn’t make conceiving or carrying a child a certainty.
That’s why it’s so important that we stop defining ‘womanhood’ in terms of ‘motherhood,’ because it’s a false equivalency that all women can become mothers, that all mothers carry their children, or that all people who carry children are mothers.”
Bennett’s story also sheds light on the broader social and legal challenges faced by transgender and non-binary parents in the United States.
Many transgender individuals encounter systemic barriers in healthcare, from forms and electronic records that assume a binary gender to medical professionals who are insufficiently trained in providing gender-affirming care.
Misgendering can cause acute emotional distress, exacerbate dysphoria, and impact the overall healthcare experience.
Moreover, the lack of inclusive policies often leaves transgender parents without adequate legal recognition, particularly in matters of parental rights, birth certificate listings, and medical decision-making.
By sharing his experiences publicly, Bennett raises awareness of these critical issues and advocates for systemic change that prioritizes respect, understanding, and inclusivity.
Three years after Hudson’s birth, Bennett and Malik continue to thrive as parents. Hudson is now a joyful, energetic, and curious three-year-old.
“This sweet guy is 3 years old today! Malik Kaspar-Williams and I are so lucky to be his parents,” Bennett wrote on social media in October 2023, celebrating their family and the joy Hudson brings into their lives.
Their journey highlights that transgender and non-binary people can successfully navigate parenthood when given respect, resources, and support, challenging outdated stereotypes about gender roles in families.
Beyond the personal and emotional dimensions, Bennett’s story carries important cultural and societal lessons.
It emphasizes the necessity of respecting individuals’ self-identification and the profound harm that can result when this respect is denied, particularly in healthcare and parenting contexts.
By advocating for proper acknowledgment of transgender and non-binary parents, Bennett helps broaden the public understanding of what parenthood can look like.
His experiences demonstrate that supporting gender diversity in parenting is not just a matter of social justice—it is also essential for the well-being and dignity of children and parents alike.
Ultimately, Bennett’s experience underscores resilience, self-determination, and the importance of compassion.
While misgendering during such a critical life event was painful, he chose to transform that pain into advocacy, education, and love.
Bennett’s story is a powerful reminder that progress comes not from anger or exclusion but from visibility, understanding, and a commitment to seeing people as they truly are.
It is a testament to the reality that family, care, and identity are deeply personal, multifaceted, and deserving of respect.
By living authentically and advocating for inclusivity, Bennett Kaspar-Williams continues to shape a more equitable and understanding society for parents of all gender identities.
