The Wood Stove Saga of Our “New-to-Us” House
Alright, story time—because apparently homeownership comes with plot twists I was not prepared for.
So my wife and I bought this house last year. Great place, lots of potential, and one little mystery item tucked away in the garage basement:
A wood stove.
Not a cute, rustic, cozy-cabin wood stove. No.
The kind that makes you pause and think, “Is this safe… or is this the final boss battle of home heating?”
Fast-forward to this summer. My dad—who has had wood stoves in his garage for like, 30 years—takes one look at the setup and says, “Oh yeah, I can fix that.”
Next thing I know, he’s replacing the stove pipe like he’s on an episode of DIY Legends, swearing up and down that everything he did is perfectly fine.
I… had doubts.
So I posted the photos to /r/woodstoves, expecting maybe a “Looks good!” or a “Just tweak this one thing.”
Nope.
The internet handed me my ego on a paper plate.
I suddenly felt like the world’s biggest moron for even thinking of lighting a fire in that thing.
And let me be clear: I haven’t used it. Not once.
And after reading the comments, I refused to even look at it sideways.
But here we are, heading into another cold season, and I’d really love to fire it up this year—you know, without burning down the house or creating a surprise skylight.
So I’m swallowing my pride and asking:
👉 What do I actually need to do to make this safe?
Not insults, not roasting (pun intended)—just real steps.
I’ve already heard everything about how “awful” the setup is. That part has been… thoroughly covered.
I just want to know:
How do I fix it? What should be replaced? Who should I call? What’s the checklist?
I’m ready to do this the right way—no shortcuts, no dad-logic engineering, no accidental reenactments of a chimney fire YouTube compilation.
Homeownership has been humbling, friends. Very humbling.
If anyone’s dealt with a basement/garage wood stove, or brought a sketchy setup back from the brink, your advice would be appreciated more than you know.
Because at this point, I’d really like to enjoy the wood stove…
—without becoming a headline. 🔥😅
